Category Archives: Life

Dear iPod

Dear iPod,

I’m pretty convinced that you have a personality. A brain. A mind of your own. I will admit that I was beyond ecstatic when I got you. I mean, I had your cousin, the sad, old, beat up ipod mini since 2004. It was really just time for him to retire. When I got you, I couldn’t believe all the cool things you could do. You allow me to watch movies at the gym, create genius playlists directly on my ipod, and by far, the coolest thing you do is automatically shuffle when I shake you. You’re like a freaking snowglobe with songs in it.

Sure, this may not always be handy like the few times I’ve dropped you in the car while I was most happily rocking out to the Spice Girls, but overall, you’re a fab little feature, I will admit. However, here comes the part where I am entirely convinced that you have grown a brain or personality or are at least some how in tune with my emotional psyche. Over the past few weeks, every time I shake you up like a kid under the tree with Christmas presents you somehow always come up with a song that has such a deep emotional connection with me, with my past, with people in my life, that I’m left almost crying by the end of this song and silently saying “Damn you iPod for drudging up all that emotional baggage. Thanks a heap!”

Point in case. John Mayer’s “Back to You” or “My Stupid Mouth.” Those are K’s songs. How the hell did you know that every single John Mayer song from Room for Squares reminds me of him? We went to see him together. We listended to him together. He made jokes about sitting at the tables in the cafeteria freshman year and mimicked how he was going to play chess with the salt & pepper shakers. HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT, IPOD??????? iPods we’re even around then. And Dave Matthew’s Say Goodbye. Another classic K song, another song you choose to play when I shake you. I became a Dave fan because K was a Dave fan. That songs basically described four whole years of our…whatever you would call it. Sometimes you’ll play “When the Stars Go Blue.” The live version by The Corrs and Bono. He introduced me to that song and I decided that’s the song I’m going to dance to at my wedding (sorry future hubby, you have no say in our first dance), and thus, I’ve loved that song for years. But every time I hear it, it always reminds me of K because he was the one who introduced me to it. So what’s the deal? Are you trying to tell me something?

You also have a habit of playing songs that bring me back to really stressful times in my life. Like KIDS by MGMT. If I could even go into the dramz that surrounded that song while making WHIP IT, well….this post would be really long. Yes, that song now reminds me of the entire process of making WHIP IT, the friends I made on that film, but good golly (yeah, I really just said that) that song caused me a lot of stressed. Stop playing it so much.

Even though I’m convinced you have your own brain now, I guess I could just press next when you play things that drudge up old memories. Or I could just shake you again in hopes I get a song I wanted like my own musical magic eight ball. But then again, maybe I like remembering the good (and bad times), especially when they continue to slip away too quickly.

So carry on little iPod, though you best believe I’m going to seriously contemplate sending my monthly therapy bills to Steve Jobs.



Hey Ian, Have you seen Missy Halperin?

See this guy to your left. Yeah, that dude. Sexy Steven Sanders is just sitting right over there, rocking his permed semi-mullet and he’s smiling at you. He’s so dreamy. Remember that time that he got his car stolen in the parking lot by that girl that he let drive it? Or that time he made the half court shot at the Laker game and then used it to get his way into any college he wanted to? Yeah, that Steve Saunders was such a sly fox.

Now, look at the guy on your right. That’s Ian Ziering. Less permed mullet, mega watt smile, kinda looks pretty totes genius for an old dude. I mean, he was on Dancing with the Stars. That shit will get you in shape. He’s the man behind responsible for the genius that was Steve Sanders. Don’t you wish they would do like a 90210 reunion show or movie? Yeah, me too.

So this is a story about Ian, but I just had to throw the Steve Sanders bit in there for nostalgia. Last night I went to my first ever hockey game at the Staples Center. Katherine scored us tickets in the FOX broadcasting catered suite and we totally rocked it out the whole night. Gabs and Carri went home drunk. Clearly the evening was a success. We got there, ate some food, watched a game we didn’t understand, proceeded to talk through he first period and then came intermission. 17 minutes of doing nothing. Or so we thought.

About halfway through intermission, the door open behind us and in walked a frantic Ian Ziering who had conned some security dude to let him in our suite. After looking around quickly, he came over to Carri and Katherine and took hold of them, physically shaking him said “Have you seen Missy? Have you seen her?” Um, yeah, Ian. Who the fuck is Missy cause we sure as hell don’t know? After asking for a couple more seconds if we knew where she was or if she would be coming, he left as frantically as he came in. It was a whirlwind In Ziering sighting and it quite possibly made my night.

We couldn’t stop talking about it for the rest of the game and even took to goolging the name he said, Missy Halperin, to discover she’s the SVP, Talent Relations for FOX Broadcasting. We hoped he would come back some time during the other intermission, but alas, he was gone, away into the night, after probably finding Missy in that stolen car from 90210 or something.

So Ian, thanks for making my fist hockey game a great one. Yeah, the Kings didn’t win. Yeah, Jon Paul didn’t get us into the locker room for Katherine’s fake birthday. But Ian, you were a pretty damn good fake birthday present if I do say so myself.

PS: Sexy shorts!

The top 9 of ’09

Hey, 2009 is almost over! You have no idea how excited I am about this. 2009 has hands down been the hardest year of my short life thus far. I faced a lot of difficult obstacles, both mentally and physically. But now I stand here 12 months later, a much better person in all respects with a whole new outlook on life, on 2010, on being 26, and on what is in store for me.

While the year was hard, I got to think about some of my favorite things of 2009. Movies, songs, moments, etc. I would say books, but alas, all I get to read are scripts and I won’t bore you with my own version of The Black List. So below are my fab lists (in no particular order), which most people will not agree with, but I don’t really care. I just thought that it was a good way to sum up the year.

My Top 9 TV Shows of 2009
Friday Night Lights
Modern Family
True Blood
The Amazing Race
So You Think You Can Dance
The Tudors
Gossip Girl/90210 (They count as one since they are guilty pleasure shows)

My Top 9 Movies on 2009
Star Trek
Inglorious Basterds
(500) Days of Summer
An Education
Up in the Air
17 Again (Shut it, Zefron rules)
New Moon (Whatever, I’m a Twi-Hard)
Where The Wild Things Are
The Hurt Locker

My Top 9 WORST Movies of 2009
Year One
Bride Wars
The Ugly Truth
Couples Retreat
My Life In Ruins
I Hate Valentine’s Day
My Sister’s Keeper
Paul Blart: Mall Cop
Ghosts of Girlfriend’s Past

The 9 songs that defined 2009 for me
Foundations – Kate Nash
A Sweet Summer’s Night on Hammer Hill – Jens Lekman
Wake Up – Arcade Fire
15 Step – Radiohead
In These Arms – The Swell Season
Empire State of Mind – Jay-Z & Alicia Keyes
If It Kills Me (Casanova Sessions) – Jason Mraz
Party in the U.S.A – Miley Cyrus

Top 9 Great Life Moments of 2009
Being offered a new job at MARVEL!!!!!!!!

Seeing The Swell Season in concert on my birthday: Life changing experience, the whole night gave me chills.

WHIP IT premiere: That movie was the thing I’ve probably worked the hardest on in the past two years. To see it come full circle was amazing.

New Moon Release: Seeing New Moon opening night with my bestie Jen. Like I said above, I’m a Twi-Hard.

Birthday weekend: Korean BBQ + champagne spray + Girl Scout/Boy Scout party at Happy Endings = AMAZE-BALLS!

Beerfest at Paramount: A day at the lot drinking free booze with my favorite girls: Bowie Bride aka the faboush Britt, Kate, Marisa, Mike, Dave, Steve, and Sonnet. We saw the dude from LOST that killed Ben’s daughter.

DRAG ME TO HELL Premiere: Another full circle moment, career-wise.

WeHo with Jamie: When Jamie came to town, we all went to dinner and out in WeHo for a night. Hands down, one of the funnest nights I’ve had EVER, despite the fact that it was 100 million degrees.

Adam & Rachel’s Wedding: Drunk on a boat celebrating my friends and making new friends at the same time.

Mika Concert: Gabs and I went to see Mika at the Palladium and danced our asses off. So much fun.

2010 is going to be even better. Trust me.

Fashion that defines me

For a girl, a have a really small closet. Seriously, I can barely fit all my clothes in there. It’s a mess, it’s unorganized, and yet, I barely where half of it. Every once and a while, I will have time to actually look through what I have and I always end up coming across those piece of my wardrobe that have long been forgotten. These are the piece that I don’t wear because the experience I had when wearing them has rubbed off on the clothes. Ok, maybe not really, but you know when you wear a shirt out, you have a HORRIBLE night in it, and then you can never wear it again because you have bad memories associated with it? Yeah, I have a whole slew of those clothes. At the same time though, I definitely have my lucky clothes. Outfits that I feel awesome in, things I’ve worn and good things have happened to me. I tend to wear these more in hopes something more amazing will happen to me while wearing them.

Thinking back on life, there are definitely experiences that are so profound, so vivid in my mind that I can always remember what I was wearing. These could be good things, or bad things, or just big life altering experience, but I always find it funny how I can remember exactly what I was wearing.

Dark jeans, white button up shirt: This was my last night is Chicago. It was the day I had graduated college and I found myself going out with Kyle while my mother stayed at my apartment and packed my things. We were leaving for Ireland the next morning. We went to Wendy’s. We had Frosties. We went and sat on the swing at Oscar Meyer school and then we said goodbye. Probably one of the hardest things I’ve never had to do, but one of the most perfect night I can remember having in my entire life. The next day, while waiting for my flight at O’Hare, I finally cried. Not only was college over, everything was ended, but I had said goodbye to my best friend. However, that outfit always made me think of that night. I wore it probably three times while in Ireland, while remembering the good times we had. It’s the only outfit from before I lost all the weight that I wish I still had, just for sentimental purposes.

Yellow jersey dress from Target: Worst. Night. Ever. I embarrassed the shit out of myself in front of some of my closest friends. I like to consider this night the begin of the end of the grad school era. After it, everything changed. I did some stupid shit that night, other people did stupid shit that night. I can never wear that dress again. Sadly, it was also the first time I wore that dress as well. Have fun in my closet sad, little yellow dress.

Cloud pajama pants, black tank top: 9/11. My mother called me in Chicago and woke me up to tell me something had happened. Then, like the rest of the world, I gathered in front of the television and just stared in shock. It took about 10 hours for me to finally cry, to let it all sink in, to break down. I can remember a lot about that day. Classes were canceled. Military jets patrolled the Chicago skyline. We watched X-Men on HBO to take a break from watching the news. I broke down crying. Matt from down the hall came and sat with me in the hall while I cried. But most of all, I remember the pajama pants and tank top.

Blue Top with Satin ribbon AND Green Forever 21 tunic with the massive broach:
Both of these tops had potential to be a bad luck tops. I had a really bad memories with both and I didn’t wear them again for months. I finally did though, it turned out not to be so bad. I have yet to have another bad thing happen to me while wearing either and continue to make good memories in both. Point in case, I wore the green tunic top the day Taylor Lautner came in to the office, walked by my desk looking all sorts of hot man-boyness while rocking a leather jacket. That was a good day.

Rules for turning one year younger

Grace Kelly was married by the time she was 25. She had her first kid by the time she was 26. Obviously, I’m a little behind. I turned 26 last week and not a moment too soon. You know how people refer to a quarterlife crisis? Well, they aren’t joking. It was like anything that could go wrong while I was 25, did go wrong. But the closer I got to 26, the more I realize that even through a year of bad times, I hadn’t really bothered to have fun and make memories. I was determine to make 26 a better year and be more optimistic about life. I had forgotten what it was like to have fun.

A couple weeks before I turned 26, and right around the time I decided that I was going to make this next year better, things started to turn around and I truly hope they only continue to get better.

In honor of turning 26, I had pretty much a week long celebration complete with concerts, New Moon, dinners, and crazy dancing at bars. It was a great start to 26 and provided me with some fabulous DO’s and DON’T’s of your birthday, in order to make it more memorable.

DO…Go see New Moon, the movie you’ve been waiting all year for. Oh wait, you haven’t been waiting all year for it? Oh, well FAIL! Clearly, you don’t know how to have fun.

DON’T…try and make out with anyone while ridiculously wasted. You won’t remember it till 24 hours later and then will leave you scared for life.

DO…spin the wheel at Happy Endings while triple fisting Heinekens, causing the DJ to call you out on the microphone for being an alcoholic.

DON’T…flirt with your waiter at IHOP after leaving Happy Endings. Your conversation will end up like mine and you will die of embarrassment.

Me: We have to go. We’re cabbing it back to Beverly Hills.
Ryan: You live in Beverly Hills?
Me: Yeah, where do you live?
Ryan: Downtown…in a warehouse.
Me: Like in 500 Days of Summer?
Ryan: Um…did they live in a warehouse in that?

DO…throw a theme party. Mine was a Girl Scout/Boy Scout party. It would have been Troop Beverly Hills themed, but then we realized there would be guys there and only so many people can dress up as Freddy Nefler.

DON’T…drop your brand new camera when you’re drunk. You’ll freak out and continue to tell everyone you dropped it because you are drunk.

…go see The Swell Season. They are hands down AMAZING! Please enjoy my commentary in the video below.

DON’T…leave home without a really massive birthday card.

…remember to bring an extra shirt when the below happens to you at your birthday dinner.

And finally…

DO…remember to have fun and create some memories! It’s your birthday, after all.

Emotionally drained and it’s only Tuesday

This past week has been interesting and stressful, all of which seem to culminate this afternoon. While I stressed cried at my desk over one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make, I talked to anybody I could about my dilemma. I talked to Jen, Britt, Jennie, Ashley, and even called my mom. Yes, I’m almost 26 years old and sometimes I still need to call my mom for advice.

While I won’t go into the detail of the drama, I’ve finally made my decision and I’m hoping that it was for the best. When it came down to it, the cons out weighed the pros. I like to think that everything happens for a reason and there is a reason behind the madness, a reason behind that prompted me to make this decision, a reason why I was forced to make it to begin with, and a reason why it will lead me to something better. I did what I had to do, and sometimes, you can’t always please everyone. I’m sure even Grace Kelly couldn’t please everyone.

It’s funny to think how beautiful and idyllic something can look on the outside, but on the inside… “What’s a Monet?” “It’s like a painting, see? From far away, it’s OK, but up close, it’s a big old mess.”

There is always a secret side to everything that seems perfect. Even Grace Kelly.

Now, to cheer myself up, I’m going to go stare at the Harper’s Bazaar Rob & KStew photos and Vanity Fair Rob pictures. I’m going to pretend that KStew fell off the motorcycle .5 seconds after this picture was taken. Whoops…too bad.

(photo source)